Today marks the release day for Shopping for Time, the new book by Carolyn Mahaney and her daughters Nicole Whitacre, Kristin Chesemore and Janelle Bradshaw. The authors were kind enough to answer a few questions from Discerning Reader reviewer Leslie Wiggins.
Shopping for Time offers a unique approach to time management. Would you share the story of how the idea for this book evolved? How did you know such a book was needed?
Carolyn-We certainly didn't set out to write about the wise use of time. No one's more surprised than we are! Really, this book comes entirely out of our own life experience. In my early years as a pastor's wife and mother of small children there were many demands upon my time. I was compelled to seek out strategies to honor God and effectively serve my family in that busy season. As a result, I found that certain practices we discuss in the book-such as rising early or taking a personal retreat-made a huge difference in my life. Like I said, I never had the remotest thought that applying these simple practices would result in a book some day. But using time wisely to the glory of God is something that the girls and I talk about all the time. So in some ways this book grew naturally out of our many conversations.
Nicole - Mom always instilled in the three of us girls a sense of purpose that flows from our salvation in Christ. She challenged us not just to let life happen, but to evaluate how we could bear the most fruit and bring the most honor to the Savior in whatever season of life we found ourselves.
Carolyn - And not only do these principles help us each and every day, but (as we allude to in our subtitle) we know many women who struggle with being overwhelmed with life's demands. You don't have to have small kids to feel this way! Teenagers and single women and empty nesters all face this temptation. We hope these principles from God's Word will serve these women as they have served the four of us.
You decided to write this book as a group. Though you are family and spend a great deal of time together, you have very different personalities and different ways of doing things, and this comes through in the book (as, for example, when you "tell on" one another to show the different ways women manage life). How did you know that the group approach would work for this particular book?
Janelle - We're such good friends and we're always talking with each other. As we share in the book, we get together most Fridays for lunch with our kids. We talk about all kinds of things, and in many ways, this book-the idea for it and the process of writing it-come directly from those many conversations.
Carolyn - We know each other so well that we're able to play off of each other's strengths (and compensate for our respective weaknesses). We brainstorm together and often ideas emerge from those times of discussion. We're always asking questions and getting advice from one another. The group approach works because that dynamic already exists amongst the four of us.
Kristin - We're not afraid to say what we think to each other. There's no fear of man when sharing an idea and we don't mind being disagreed with. I think this freedom creates an atmosphere that stimulates ideas and creativity.
Nicole - Even when we disagree on a particular point, we're committed to talking it through in a loving and humble manner. At times, we've had to stop writing in order to talk through different perspectives on an issue. It may take several hours and a few tears may even be shed. But in the end, I think we have greater clarity and our convictions are strengthened as we hammer out an issue between the four of us.
With the four of you working together on this project, how did you determine what to include in the book and what to omit?
Carolyn - There are so many time management books out there, we didn't see a need to duplicate them. Rather, our goal was to promote thoughtful, careful living according to God's Word; to help women discern God's will for how to use their time; and to offer practical help for those who feel exhausted and overwhelmed. We wanted to encourage women to apply the same effort and intentionality they do to shopping to the way they use their time. The ultimate result of "shopping for time" is that our lives radiate the peace and joy that commend the gospel of Jesus Christ.
Nicole - we stuck to stuff that's actually worked for us. Everything we say in the book has been life-tested-albeit imperfectly. But we didn't want to include good ideas we hadn't actually tried or didn't benefit us personally.
Janelle - We didn't want to write an overwhelming book about how not to be overwhelmed!
I love the idea of a personal retreat. In the book you give some general directions for planning one and carrying it out, but could you share some specifics about your own retreats? Have you ever had a retreat that didn't turn out like you had hoped?
Carolyn - Well, what we shared in the book is what we actually do! Often I'll come prepared ahead of time to focus primarily on one or two key areas of my life. In addition to planning, I try to spend extended time reading. I'll usually bring a book to read pertaining to my current season or roles (wife, mother, etc), my spiritual life, or a specific area of needed growth. Reading stimulates my thinking. I find that I don't think big thoughts on my own. But I'm inspired by the ideas of others.
Kristin - A retreat gives me a chance to prepare-both through prayer and practical planning-for the responsibilities of the upcoming season such as my children's school year or serving my husband in a particular way.
Nicole - I find it helpful to ask the question: "What is one area in my life causing me the most concern or anxiety at present?" and then spend time studying God's Word, reading books, praying, and developing a plan for change in that particular area.
Janelle - As far as a retreat not turning out like we hoped I would say that realistic expectations go a long way. We always plan to do more than we are able to accomplish. But if we remember that even though we didn't get to everything, we're further along than if we'd never taken a retreat, this keeps things in perspective and keeps us coming back.
You write in the book about shopping for time according to season of life. Each of you is in her own season of life. How are each of you using the principles set forth in your book right now?
Carolyn - while we're very aware of our shortcomings, we are each seeking to apply all of the "shopping for time" principles in our current seasons. For me, as a wife and mother with one teenage son still at home, I'm in a season with more discretionary time on my hands. These principles-or "tips" as we refer to them in the book--help me as I seek to be intentional and purposeful in order to bear the most fruit for Christ in these years. For my three girls, they are very busy with husbands in ministry and very young children. The "shopping for time" principles help them spend time in God's Word and be peaceful and purposeful, even in the midst of juggling many varied responsibilities.
Could either of you share about a time when you realized you had not shopped wisely for your time and had to "rescue [your time] from loss"?
Carolyn - Sure-we're un-wise shoppers of time on a daily basis! In some form or another, we're always failing or falling short. But as we have sought to grow and change, we have found these practices to bear significant fruit over many years.
Kristin - It's important to keep trying and not give up. When you fail, you simply need to repent (where necessary) and ask for God's grace to change.
Nicole - Ultimately, we must remember the gospel. We're not accepted by God on the basis of how wisely we use our time. But we rejoice that we are clothed in the perfect righteousness of God.
What are your goals or hopes for Shopping for Time? How will you measure its success?
Nicole - We want this book to be truly useful and helpful, not merely inspiring or entertaining. We hope it makes a tangible difference in the everyday lives of women, from teenagers to grandmothers and everyone in between.
Carolyn - As our subtitle says, we want women to experience relief from the overwhelming demands under which they often labor. We want them to one day be able to experience the God-given fruit of a life well spent.
Janelle - Our dedication expresses our greatest hopes for this book: it's for our daughters. If nothing else, we want Caly and Tori (and any future little girls) to become wise shoppers of time to the glory of God.
Obviously you ladies are very close, not just as mother and daughters and as sisters, but as friends. What counsel would you give to a woman in the early years of motherhood to help her cultivate this same type of relationship?
Carolyn - The early years of training, discipline, memory making, and simply caring for your children is the foundation upon which you can build a friendship in the later years. Mothers of small children should not discount the significance of simply "being there." Often times I see young women putting undo pressure on themselves to spend an excessive amount of time interacting with and planning special activities for their children. While these are wonderful things to do, I would want to encourage them that their loving presence in the home and their faithfulness to meet their children's needs each and every day has an effect far beyond what they can imagine.
It's when they get older that hours and hours of conversation are required to build and maintain a friendship. We wrote our book Girl Talk to help facilitate conversation and friendship between mothers and their daughters.
Be sure to read our review of Shopping for Time.
